Sunday, June 21, 2009

Rude New Yorker

Some of the first words that come to mind when thinking of a New Yorker are:
  • rude
  • arrogant
  • self-indulgent
  • snobby
  • bitchy
  • highly opinionated
  • ignorant
  • phony
  • fake
  • rich
  • Its funny coming back to the city I've spent all my life in. I feel like an outsider, even in my own home. I feel that Philadelphia has opened my eyes to the life I was living and the life I live now. I spent 6 years in a private school in manhattan, to some degree its a lot of peoples dream to live in the city that never sleeps. Before I left for Philadelphia, I felt that New York was the place to be to meet people, to have friends, to live your life, but now my entire idea has changed and to be frank my mother does not agree with me. I grew up with a therapist and shrink, yeah I must be pretty fucked up haha. I believe that because I grew up with this background for parents, I tried to keep an open mind to things that I didn't understand. I have always tried to be the odd one out, not for the reason to being different but for the reason of trying not to be labeled as the "New Yorker". I didn't make friends with people because I knew I was different; I just never knew what it was. After going to college and meeting people from all over I realized that my open mind has sort of shot me in the foot. I look at New Yorkers as a breed of people that I don't relate to, even though I was born in New York and have lived my entire life here. College has changed me for the better but everyone looks at me like I am some freak of nature. What's the problem with drinking a whiskey and coke or liking country music. Am I already deemed a hick? What about my friends who all love country music and love any type of whiskey who only live an hour away from New York in South Jersey. Shouldn't New Yorker's be more open then anyone considering it's one of the biggest places of tourism? It seems not. Already being home for a week, I've realized how different I am, especially after all my friends have mentioned that the new me is not what they expected when they said they wanted to see me again. I've grown up and it seems that nobody else has. For example my mother. It seems that as a teenager every person has problems with their mother, but it seems that the only type of relationship I can have with her is either happy and friendly or at odds. Finally after years of hating who I was because I didn't have friends and I couldn't figure out why, I'm happy and love who I am, yet my mother is so critical of who I've become. I'm now somebody who:
  • has friends
  • has confidence in myself
  • is intelligent and can show it
  • is in love with a marine
  • is more aware of other people
  • is happy to be myself
  • accepts all of myself
  • Do any of these qualities seem negative?? So why should my parent who claims to love me be upset when I come home and don't fit in anywhere except with my friends back in Philly? Why is it so hard to accept that I am different and that the qualities that I have are special at my age. How many girls have confidence in themselves? or actually accept who they are at 18? How many girls can honestly say that they found love and feel cared for? How many can be proud of themselves? I can't count that many, I know maybe two or three who have maybe one or two of these qualities. I feel that college is the place where you learn about yourself. Well I've learned over the last year that I am: a strong individual who loves life, loves my friends, loves myself. I have learned that I'm not so different, and what I think makes me different makes me special to people that I know now. Nobody I know in Philadelphia looks at me and says I'm some snotty, snobby, uptight, bitchy, or rude New Yorker and that's how I want to keep it! *Sempre Fi* *I mean no offense to ANY New Yorkers reading my posts, I am myself a born and raised New Yorker; These are just opinions and venting about what I have dealt with since moving back to New York*

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